Friday, June 29, 2007

Debut

The casa de S has had a rather busy week, hence the lack of posts. My apologies. My best excuse is that I have a nasty chest cold and am once again plagued by God awful allergies. I am sure the allergies are connected to our new addition. I am hoping that I will adjust and that my eyes will quit weeping soon. If not I will be forced to seek medical attention yet again.

But enough about me!

The boys attended their very first vacation bible school this week. They had an absolute blast. The week ended with a wonderful program featuring all of the kids. You must forgive Jesse and myself as this is the very first time we have had the pleasure of sitting in the audience and watching our boys perform in a school production. For your viewing pleasure, I have included some of the rather sketchy video I was able to take. In the first clip, Isaac is in the far right side of the frame, in sun glasses and a black shirt. Nathan is hidden behind the little girl on the far right in the print dress. I moved mid song in an attempt to get a little footage of Nathan, which you will see on the second clip. He is the little guy in the center top in the sun glasses.

Aren't they talented and adorable!???! Mary took some still shots with her awesome camera and we also have better video on the actual video camera. I will get this media ready for sharing as soon as I can.





I'm back! I added a very short slide show so that you can you see 2 of the FABULOUS pictures that Mary took this afternoon.

Saturday, June 23, 2007

What a Difference a Year Makes

Today marks the official one year anniversary of Jesse's surgery. We spent the evening at one of our favorite haunts, sipping pineapple martinis with oysters on the half shell, reminiscing and reflecting on how different we felt one year ago today.

Later in the evening we went out and bought a new all in one fax/scanner/copier/printer. Isaac tripped over the cord of our previous printer and sent it flying. I tell you, they are fascinating machines when you see them in 437 pieces.

In the years to come, we plan on many more evenings as scintillating as this, free from anxiety and fear over the health of Jesse's heart.

With hearts full of gratitude and love, we bid farewell to this significant milestone. Thanks again to all who have supported us through these experiences.

PS Anna is much better today. No more vomiting, she is nursing well and she even consumed a few solids for breakfast. Hopefully she will quickly gain back the weight she lost and be back to her old self. She slept VERY well last night, which means mommy did too. In the words of our darling nephew Sammy, "Yay Anna!"

Friday, June 22, 2007

Life is Exhausting!


Not at all meaning to make a joke out of Jesse's post, I am probably 2nd only to Jesse in the feeling of relief and joy that this past year is in fact past.

However, this past week has just been so exhausting, I am having some trouble focusing on anything other than how much I want to go to sleep.

Anna was up again last night, vomiting and miserable. We just don't know what is wrong, the stomach bugs I am familiar with are the 24 hour sort, is it normal for it to go on like this? Help me out moms. I am seriously sleep deprived and feeling quite desperate. Nathan appears to have a touch of the same bug, but he is not nearly as miserable as Anna.

Honestly, I don't feel all that great either. But that is likely due to the fact that I have not slept more than a few interrupted hours in several days.

I have nothing particularly interesting to report. In my current frame of mind, I am far less enthusiastic about cleaning up puppy poo than I was a few days ago. Bummer.

Thought you would enjoy this picture I took of the boys. Aunt Mary came to take them to a movie one day this week after Anna had been up all night. They look pretty cool, if you ask me.

Please send me mom sympathy vibes and sleep wishes. I think that only other moms can truly appreciate how desperate, tired and frustrated I feel right now.

I hope that all is well with you and that you are NOT visited by this God awful virus.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Life Is Wonderful

Written by Jesse
As I’m sure my darling wife would tell you, I am a sucker for anniversaries - always have been. I view certain dates in our past as a kind of temporal landmark - a point of reference for where we’ve been, what our experiences were at that time, and how we’ve grown since. There are many dates in our lives that I view as such, including the obvious ones, like our wedding anniversary and birthdays, to more obscure ones, such as the day I asked Cherith to ‘go out’ with me, the day of our car accident, and the day we brought Nathan home from the hospital after his 17-day NICU stay.

As many reading this are probably aware, we are fast approaching one of these ‘landmarks’ in our lives. Saturday, June 23rd, will be my one-year anniversary of having open-heart surgery to replace my defunct tricuspid valve and decrease the size of my right atrium. As seems so often the case, I can hardly believe that a year has passed since this momentous occasion.

Over this past week, Cherith and I have been reflecting on how we felt around this time last year: the fear and anxiety; the doubt, the dread, and that forever nagging question of “what if?” lingering at the forefront of our thoughts. Our lives had been turned upside down when we first heard the news, accentuated all the more by an initial prognosis that equated to a death sentence. Thankfully, this doom scenario was nullified by a cardiologist who actually knew what she was talking about, though having my chest split open and my heart stopped for a couple of hours while it was being sliced into wasn’t exactly my idea of a good time.

Speaking of which, and with some risk of sounding a bit cliché, going through such an event tends to sharpen one’s perspective on what life is truly about. Life is full of the unexpected, and the manner with which we deal with these events help define who we are. Saying good-bye to Cherith and the kids was by far the most difficult thing I’ve ever had to endure, especially with that nagging WHAT IF? screaming in my head. But ultimately, I had to trust… I had to trust; to trust that my family was not alone in that waiting room, to trust that they would be okay if the unimaginable happened, to trust that I was not alone in fighting this monster.

I remember waking from the surgery, and for a very brief moment, I imagined I had dozed off one lazy Sunday afternoon. Then reality flooded in, and I remember being overwhelmed with a sense of tremendous relief: I made it! From that moment, the burden of the fear and anxiety, the doubt, the dread, and that constantly nagging question of ‘what if?’ was lifted. Looking into my Cherith’s eyes, hearing her sweet voice and feeling her soft touch did more for my heart than any surgery ever could. This was behind us, and our healing could now begin.

Since then, as is always the case, life has been filled with ups and downs. Having to deal with arrhythmias as a side effect was certainly not something I had hoped to encounter, but thankfully these too have been remedied (though having a radio-frequency ablation earlier this year brought a whole new appreciation to the term ‘heart burn’). And now, we are able to bask in the freedom of burdens lifted; to savor the spoils of a hard-fought victory; and to live life to its fullest in constant gratitude and appreciation.

I will forever be grateful to all those who helped my family throughout all of this: to those who brought meals, who folded laundry, who mowed our lawn, thank you. To those who cared for our kids, who came to the hospital, who sent ‘get well soon’ cards, thank you. To those who prayed for us, who spoke words of encouragement, who offered a shoulder to cry on, thank you. Your contributions showed an act of love and kindness far beyond what I though possible, and I am forever indebted to you.

So one year has passed, and instead of looking forward to a summer full of hospital gowns and beeping monitors, we look forward to swimming lessons and cleaning up puppy poo. I actually don’t even mind that it has been so hot lately, and I’m really looking forward to taking Anna to her first 4th of July fireworks display. I know that other challenges will come, and I’m sure they will be accompanied with their own questions of ‘what if?’. But for now, at this moment, life is wonderful, and it feels really good…

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Phantom of the S House



List of names considered before the boys settled on Phantom:

Snowball
Golden
Baby Jesus
God
Zombie
Venom

I am very happy they settled on Phantom.

Anna is doing ok, she is still pretty run down and tired. She has not eaten all day and we have been working to push her fluids. She did have some "other end" issues today, indicating that she is not quite over this little bug.

It's about that time of year, right?

The S Family has some sort of weird cosmic connection to Children's Hospital in mid to late June and early July. Last year it was obviously Jesse's surgery that kept us there. The year before that Isaac was hospitalized for 3 or 4 days with a nasty illness. And just to keep the pattern going, last night we spent the evening in the Children's Hospital ER with our darling baby Anna.

At about 5 pm yesterday Anna started throwing up. We did not think much of the first two times as she did not appear or act sick, did not have a fever and did not even seem all that upset about the fact that she threw up. We even tried to go out to dinner, thinking that it was just a wonky banana that her tummy rejected and that she would be fine.

If you happen to be one of the people who had the unfortunate pleasure of watching her vomit all over the restaurant floor...I AM SO SORRY! Send me a cleaning bill for your shoes, I feel really bad! My apologies also to the wait staff as under ordinary circumstances I would have cleaned up the mess myself. It was about this time that we realized we had something more significant than a rogue banana on our hands and I left without so much as an apology or an offer to clean up my child's vomit myself. Again, I AM SO SORRY!!

Anna continued to vomit about once every 10 to 15 minutes throughout the evening. In consultation with our pediatrician and at about 8:30 when she started getting pale and listless, we headed for the ER.

I will spare you the gory details, but we became more and more concerned as the appearance of the vomit started changing. By this time she was VERY upset at the intensity of her vomiting but falling asleep between vomits because she was so tired. Poor, sweet baby girl.

The er staff refrained from giving her an IV, for which I am eternally grateful. They let us try syringes of Pedialyte every few minutes until she finally stopped vomiting. She evidenced no symptoms other than a nasty virus that hit her really hard. For most of this time, she was not even running a fever.

She did have a rough night and I am sure we will all be pretty tired today. Around 1 AM I broke down and decided to ignore the doctor's directions about not nursing her until morning. Anna nurses to sleep, always has, and she just could not get herself settled down. I am now very glad I chose to ignore those directions, as my good friends at La Leche League tell me that breast milk is actually NOT considered a dairy product and is therefore not irritating to an upset tummy as cow's milk might be.

This morning she is acting a bit run down, though she is currently swatting at my hands as I type which means, "Mommy get off that thing and pay attention to me!"

Guess I better run, have a great day!

Update: She just went down for her nap about 2 hours early. She kept putting her head down on my shoulder. She refused to nurse before her nap, unheard of for Anna. She just let me put her in her bed, rolled over and closed her eyes. I don't think she is feeling all that great.

Monday, June 18, 2007

Fancy Myself a Photog

I like to, but really I am not. I do not have the camera or the training. But I would LOVE to be an actual photog, clearly I get a huge kick out of photographing my children.

The pics in the slide show below were taken with Mary's FABULOUS camera. If any of you are sitting around wondering what kind of present I might like, the material think I currently want most in the world is an awesome camera like that one. It does not even have to be that cool or professional grade. I really must update my digi cam.

Given that I am hopelessly unphotogenic, is that a word?, it is a damn good thing that my kids are. You cannot EVER take a good or even decent picture of me. Staged or natural, it does not matter. I look like a chubby golem on crack in every picture I have ever appeared in.

My kids, on the other hand, photograph beautifully as evidenced in the following pics. I think that last one in this series, the one where she has a little grin, is my all time favorite picture of Anna.

The Many Faces of the Divine Ms Anna S

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Father's Day Slide Show

Good evening all! Scroll down if you have not had a chance to read my original Father's Day post. I poured out my feelings via blogland earlier today, but I thought you might also enjoy some pictures of our Father's Day fun.

We started our day by attending church. The boys are doing REALLY well with their Sunday School classes. Anna is less than thrilled with staying in the nursery, but she is adjusting. We had brunch with grandma and grandpa, then home for naps.

In the afternoon we checked out an awesome museum, dedicated to the history of flight. I am thinking this will be a great location for a birthday party. The boys got to sit in the cockpit of a Vertol H-21 Shawnee/Work Horse, Click here to see a picture of this helicopter. They were SO excited. Is there anything more intriguing to a 4 and 5 year old than a huge, flying hunk of metal?

After the museum we had dinner, played in the fountain and then hit Starbucks for dessert. What a lovely day with daddy.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

I know there are many people out there who view Mother's and Father's Days as nothing more than an attempt to put more money in the pockets of the greeting card producing set and to an extent I am sure that is true,

BUT...

I personally see NOTHING wrong with taking a little extra time once a year to say an extra special thank you to the moms and dads who make our world a better place, who tenderly watch over, teach and love their offspring. Yes, we should always be thankful and always make sure they know they are loved, but what is wrong with a little extra effort now and then?

{Cherith steps off the soap box}

To my husband Jesse, my best friend, my partner in crime, etc.

Thank you for being THE most wonderful father on this beautiful planet. I am thankful each and every day that our children have you to love them. We are all very blessed indeed to have you.

This Father's Day has such special meaning to me and I will admit that I have been holding back tears most of the day. I honestly thought I was going to loose it in church this morning. Rest assured they are happy tears. Our future was so uncertain at this time last year. All of your Father's Day gifts were chosen so that you would have something to do in the hospital during your recovery. There are not strong enough words in any language for me to express how utterly grateful I am to have you with us today. Your children adore you, I love you more than life itself and we are honored that we were given the gift of your presence this past year and for many years to come.

I may be a little weepy the rest of the day and especially during the week to come. Just turn your head and give me a minute to compose myself, don't hug me or acknowledge the tears or I will absolutely loose it. They are happy tears, the most happy tears I have ever cried. I LOVE YOU JESSE!

NOTE: If you are new to this blog and utterly confused by this post, here is a little background info. Jesse has a congenital heart defect called Epstein's anomaly. On June 23, 2006, Jesse, age 29, underwent open heart surgery to replace his tricuspid valve. At the time, our kids were ages 4, 3 and 9 weeks. If you would like to read the blog I kept before, during and after the surgery, you can find the "start" of our journey by signing up for a free account at Care Pages . Our former blog is called AnnaNathanandIsaacsDaddy.

Happy Father's Day to all the fathers out there, especially those who I know are in close competition with Jesse for the tile of "World's Best Father." ;)

Friday, June 15, 2007

Faces

Many of you know of Jesse's and my obsessive desire to grow our family by adopting from China. Well, ok, I am probably the only one who is obsessive about it. If you did not know, now you do. We do not talk about it much, save with a few trusted family members and friends, and I have never talked about it here. I do not plan to publicly discuss any further details on this issue as I feel it is a very private and personal matter, but I felt you would need a little background information as to why I am writing what I am about to write.

I follow several charitable organizations that work directly with the orphanages in China. You may or may not have noticed the link to one of these organizations, Half the Sky, in the side bar to the left.

Anther organization that I love, A Child's Right, recently completed a trip to China. They installed several water purification systems in a number of the orphanages. The pictures of their trip are absolutely amazing and I want to share them with you. I know there are a number of people who do not understand this obsession of mine, I hope that looking at all these beautiful faces will help you appreciate some of the reasons why this is such an important issue for me.

There are a LOT of photos here. Please, if you can, take the time to look through them all. This is such an amazing opportunity to see into these orphanages.
A Child's Right

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Gross and really gross


What can I say about the last few days in the S house? Well, truly I cannot complain too much. Compared to events of years past, the past week has been a picnic.

HOWEVER...

I feel the need to whine for just a minute as I am in pain and whining is just want I want to do when I am in pain.

Last Sunday I was 2 miles into a run on a lovely spring evening when my right foot caught an uneven spot in the sidewalk of a neighbor. Before I fully appreciated the situation, I hit the pavement in what was probably the worst fall I have ever experienced. Thankfully, both my palms, wrists and right knee appear banged up and bruised, but otherwise ok.

My left knee, on the other hand, now sports a truly gruesome injury that has been unofficially diagnosed as 2nd degree road rash. Um, can we just all say a collective OUCH!? I do not mean to complain, really I don't, but OW! OW! OW! The twice daily scrubbing with soap, warm water and wash cloth earn an even more emphatic OW! OW! OW!
The strain, sprain, twist or whatever you want to call it, to my actual joint is also quite painful and will probably keep me from running for at least another week or so. Bummer. In reality, it will probably keep me from running for a lot longer than 2 weeks, given that I am caring for a home and 3 kids and there is no way I can stay off it as much as I should. Ah well.

Could have been worse I suppose.

I have decided against posting a pic of my knee because, really, it is pretty nasty and no one wants to see that. Mary saw it when it was a new injury. Esther saw it today and seemed convinced that I will soon have my leg amputated. If you want to know how gross it really is, give one of them a call.

In other news, the pic at the top of this post shows a nasty critter that Esther and Mary caught in the front yard and housed in a bug house for the boys' amusement. This thing was about 6 inches long, including that long, pointy, black thing you see there. Esther's brilliant Google skills, "wasp with really long thingy," informs us that
this is the critter they caught.

Again, not meaning to complain, but I live in this state and specifically in the city in this state so that I DON'T have to deal with too many creepy crawlies of this sort. EW!

We took it to babanana's house, wowed them with the catch and then released it. I hope we never see it again, though the boys DID think it was pretty cool.

For a post that started out with a statement about not wanting to complain, I certainly managed to complain a lot, didn't I? I will refrain from further grumblings and go ice my knee.
Love to all!

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Thank you Aunt Mary!

Anna absolutely LOVES the Kangaroo climber that you gave her. I had no trouble putting it together. Here is a video for you. This went on for about 75 minutes before she fell asleep on the floor!

Sunday, June 10, 2007

When you are too cheap/tired/lazy to travel to an actual water park...

The S Family has been enjoying all things aquatic these last few weeks. Even Anna has decided that water is not her enemy. Major breakthrough there folks. Until this week, that girl has sobbed through every single bath since birth. Apparently she has found her sea legs and we are in for loads of summer time water fun.

The boys also love the pool, the hose and anything else that is cold and wet. Thus far we have enjoyed an unseasonably cool Spring, but things are starting to heat up around here. We plan to spend quite a bit of our time lounging in and/or around the pool.

Below you will find both a slide show of recent pool pics and a video of what we do when we are just too lazy to walk the 1 looooooong block to our pool. I hauled myself up on top of the playhouse to position the hose just so. I did not break ANYTHING during my descent; not the playhouse, not the ladder, not my ankle, not even a nail. You should be VERY impressed.

(Yes, I am aware that the video is sideways. Just turn your head or laptop. Apparently when you turn the digi cam sideways to record, your video comes out rotated 90 degrees. I know that I COULD solve this problem by learning how to use my blasted digi video camera, but I just have not gotten there yet. Working on it, I promise! Send your chiropractor bills to me.)

PS Who, tell me WHO, taught my boys to say, "Yeah baby!!" with a weird little accent? I am not at all fond of this expression, probably related to my dislike of Austin Powers and/or my career, I am not sure which.



Wednesday, June 6, 2007

The Family Table my Backside!

I figured I should not title a blog post with a swear word.

I assume you have all watched those lovely commercials that encourage families to sit down and have heartwarming dinners together? Sit down! Have dinner! Communicate! Review your day! Debate hot topics! Share your thoughts, feelings and hopes for the future! It'll be great and all the world will be rosy.

Someone please tell me what I am doing wrong.

Without fail, the S Family sits down to dinner together every night. Most days we eat outside at the FABULOUS new picnic table on our deck, lovingly built for us by Baba. I cook healthy meals, packed with fresh veggies and whole grains. I love to try new recipes and am teaching myself to prepare dishes that I know Jesse and the kids will love, despite the fact that I am not crazy about them (read: anything that includes fish).

So what am I doing wrong?

Read, if you will, the following excerpt from a typical S Family dinner table.

Cherith, "Let's pray."

Nathan, "I have to go poop!"

Isaac, "Ha ah aha hahahahahha!! Nathan said poop!"

Jesse and/or Cherith, "You can poop after dinner Nathan, we are going to pray now."

Nathan, "I have to go poop now! I really do!"

Isaac, "Ha ah aha hahahahahha!! Nathan said poop!"

Cherith and/or Jesse, "Nathan you do this every night and every night we tell you that you need to poop before dinner. You can wait."

Nathan, "I have to poop NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Isaac, "Ha ah aha hahahahahha!! Nathan said poop!"

Jesse and or Cherith, "Isaac, stop it! Fine Nathan, go poop and then get back here so we can pray and eat dinner."

Jesse, "Anna stop throwing food, you are going to sit in your high chair while mommy and daddy eat."

Cherith, "Nathan, hurry up!"

Isaac, "I don't like this! I'm not eating it!"

Cherith and/or Jesse, "You liked it when we had it last week, it is the same food. Please eat your dinner."

Isaac, "Can I have some catsup/dip/butter?"

Cherith and/or Jesse, "No Isaac you already have enough catsup/dip/butter."

Nathan, "Mommy I'm done! Come wipe me!"

pause....all return to the table

Cherith, "Let's pray."

Jesse prays.

Cherith, "Amen."

Isaac, "Amen."

Nathan, "Elephant!"

Isaac, "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Nathan said elephant instead of amen!!"

Anna, while vigorously shaking head, "MUMUMUMUMUMUMUMU!!!!!!!!!" (Loosely translated, this means GET ME OUT OF THIS DAMN CHAIR NOW!!!!"

Cherith and/or Jesse, "No Anna, you need to eat your food. Mommy and daddy are going to have dinner now, you sit until we are done. Isaac stop laughing at your brother and Nathan, quit being so goofy."

Isaac, "I don't like this! I'm not eating it!"

Cherith and/or Jesse, "Isaac we already discussed this, eat your dinner."

Isaac, "Can I have some catsup/dip/butter?"

Cherith and/or Jesse, "No Isaac you already have enough catsup/dip/butter."

Isaac, "Can I have some more chocolate milk?"

Cherith and/or Jesse, "No Isaac you only get one cup of milk, you can have some water."

Nathan,"I'm done!"

Jesse and/or Cherith, "Nathan you only ate 2 bites. You need to eat your dinner, this is the last food today. No snack before bed and/or no dessert unless you eat more of your dinner."

Nathan, "How many bites do I have to take?"

Jesse and/or Cherith, "Nathan, please just eat your dinner."

Nathan, "How many bites?"

Jesse and or Cherith, "Ok, 2 bites of meat and 4 bites of veggie."

Isaac, "I love this now! This is my favorite food ever!"

Cherith, "That's nice Isaac, I am glad you like it. Please remember what you just said when I make it again next week."

Jesse and/or Cherith, "Nathan get off of the floor, sit in your chair and eat your dinner."

Isaac, "Here Anna, you can have this."

Jesse, "No Isaac! She will just throw it.....!"

Pause in conversation, frantic cleaning of unwisely purchased beige upholstery.

Jesse, "Isaac, thank you for trying to share, but please do not give Anna anymore food, she just throws it around."

Anna, "MUMUMUMUMUMUMUMUM!!!! AAAAHHHHEEEEEE!!!!!!!!"

Jesse and/or Cherith, "No Anna, you stay in your chair until mommy and daddy are done with our dinner.

Anna, "mumumumumumumumumdadadadadadadadad dadoooooo dadooooo dadoooo"

Isaac, "Look daddy, Anna smeared guacamole in her hair, all over her arms and onto her clothes."

Jesse with heavy sigh, "Yes Isaac, we see."

Cherith, "Nathan get off of the floor and eat your dinner!"

Nathan, "I'M DONE!!"

Cherith, "One more bite of veggie."

Nathan eats bite and takes off running.

Cherith, "Nathan, come back here, sit in your chair and ask to be excused."

Nathan sulks back to the table.

Nathan, "Can I please be excused?"

Cherith, "Yes Nathan, go play."

Isaac bolts from the table.

Jesse, "Isaac come back and ask to be excused."

Isaac, "I am not done yet, I will come back later and finish."

Cherith and/or Jesse, "No Isaac, when you leave the table your are finished eating. If you want to eat more, come back now."

Isaac sulks back to table.

Isaac, "Can I eat Nathan's food that he doesn't want?"

Jesse and/or Cherith, "No Isaac, you have plenty. You can have more vegetable/whole grain/low fat protein if you are still hungry."

Isaac, while bolting from the table, "I'M DONE!"

Jesse, "Isaac come back and ask to be excused."

Isaac sulks back to table.

Isaac, "Can I please be excused."

Anna, "SHRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Jesse, "Yes Isaac you can go now."

Cherith and/or Jesse, "I'll do the dishes and clean the kitchen if you clean up Anna."

Thus endith a typical S Family dinner.

Having read this, can someone now please tell me WHAT THE HELL I AM DOING WRONG???

The very next time I see one of those commercials I am going to hurl the lengthy list of interesting current events I was planning to discuss at our heartwarming family table at the TV.

Tuesday, June 5, 2007

Honey, I Blame YOU

Perhaps we can teach him some more words? Another song? The actual melody? SOMETHING?



PS Yes that IS another band-aid over Nathan's eye. He healed nicely, stitches were out...and then daddy threw a frisbe that clocked him right in the same place and re-opened the cut, Niiiiiiccceee.

Monday, June 4, 2007

Toddler's Creed

I don't think this needs any additional comment. It does do a great job of summarizing my typical day to day activities.

THE TODDLER'S CREED
If it is on, I must turn it off.

If it is off, I must turn it on.

If it is folded, I must unfold it.

If it is a liquid, it must be shaken, then spilled.

If it a solid, it must be crumbled, chewed or smeared.

If it is high, it must be reached.

If it is shelved, it must be removed.

If it is pointed, it must be run with at top speed.

If it has leaves, they must be picked.

If it is plugged, it must be unplugged.

If it is not trash, it must be thrown away.

If it is in the trash, it must be removed, inspected, and thrown on the floor.

If it is closed, it must be opened.

If it does not open, it must be screamed at.

If it has drawers, they must be rifled.

If it is a pencil, it must write on the refrigerator, monitor, or table.

If it is full, it will be more interesting emptied.

If it is empty, it will be more interesting full.

If it is a pile of dirt, it must be laid upon.

If it is stroller, it must under no circumstances be ridden in without protest. It must be pushed by me instead.

If it has a flat surface, it must be banged upon.

If Mommy's hands are full, I must be carried.

If Mommy is in a hurry and wants to carry me, I must walk alone.

If it is paper, it must be torn.

If it has buttons, they must be pressed.

If the volume is low, it must go high.

If it is toilet paper, it must be unrolled on the floor.

If it is a drawer, it must be pulled upon.

If it is a toothbrush, it must be inserted into my mouth.

If it has a faucet, it must be turned on at full force.

If it is a phone, I must talk to it.

If it is a bug, it must be swallowed.

If it doesn't stay on my spoon, it must be dropped on the floor.

If it is not food, it must be tasted.

If it is food, it must not be tasted.

If it is dry, it must be made wet with drool, milk, or toilet water.

If it is a car seat, it must be protested with arched back.

If it is Mommy, it must be hugged.

Friday, June 1, 2007

The conversation no parent wants to have with their son...

(written by Jesse)
The boys occasionally enjoy playing make-believe games that involve them asking me for money, and I oblige by handing them a pocket-full of air. They then take the air and go off to purchase whatever they are imagining they are buying.

So the other day, Nathan is playing this game with me, and asks me for three hundred dollars. I ask what he will do with this money, to which he replies "It's to fix my car...Oh, and for my baby!" As he walked away, I looked at Cherith and said "You know, I REALLY hope we don't have that same conversation in 14 years!"

In other news, we are happily approaching the one year anniversary of receiving my brand new bovine pericardial bio prosthesis size 33mm Edwards heart valve at the tricuspid position (try saying that three times in a row), which is on June 23rd. It is so awesome to be able to look forward to a summer without dreading a major surgery and the recovery time that follows. I guess it's true what they say: "Open heart surgery can really put a damper on your summer activities" (okay, truthfully, I don't think 'they' really say that at all; or rather, if they did say that, it would sound silly and out-of-place - but I digress).

Anyhow, Cherith and I intend to celebrate this milestone by going to my most favoritest (I'm well aware of the bad grammar) dining establishment in the whole wide world: Del Frisco's Double Eagle Steak House. What better way to thank the cow that donated its pericardium than to eat one of its relatives?